It might seem like an odd thing to say, ‘Be friends with yourself’. You probably just assume you are already friends with yourself. You must be, otherwise why would you hang out so much? But look at it like this…
Imagine you’re sitting with your best friend, and a long-time friend of theirs that you’ve only just met. During the course of the conversation your friend’s friend keeps making comments to your friend like;
“You’re getting really fat you know.”
“That was a really stupid thing to say.”
“No wonder no one fancies you.”
“God, you’re a miserable ****!”
Would you put up with it? No, you wouldn’t. You would defend your friend, pointing out the many good qualities they had. And you would recognise (quite rightly so) that this ‘friend’ of theirs was a poor friend indeed, and that they would be much better off not having them in their life.
So if that is the case, why do we put up with such abuse from ourselves?
I’m always doing it. Criticising myself for saying stupid things or doing stupid things (see, even now!), having a go at myself for not being the right shape, and, worst of all, putting myself down for not practising enough and not being more advanced in my yoga. In short, I put up with abuse from myself that I would never put up with from anyone else; ever!
A good friend is kind, helpful and generous. They want the best for us, and support us in the things we do. They are not blind to our faults, but they find a way to help us realise our mistakes in a way that doesn’t make us feel bad about ourselves. They are honest with us, but also accepting of us as we are. They want us to be happy, and they want to help us find that happiness wherever it may lie.
So be a better friend with yourself. Be supportive in your honesty, celebrate your achievements, laugh about your ‘failures’, and give yourself a break when your really **** things up; because that’s what good friends do.