“Life Is Pain, Highness.”

“Anyone who says differently is selling something.”

It’s been a difficult couple of weeks. Y’know what it’s like when nothing you try and do works out? That’s what it’s been like for me.

(Y’know what, I’m not going to go into the whole thing now. It’s just a load of blah blah blah, and really, who can be bothered?)

The giveaway is over. The entire time it ran a whopping six people entered. That in itself is a little dis-heartening. Add to that the fact that some of them didn’t even qualify for entry as they liked a post but didn’t follow, or something like that, and it all starts to get you a bit down.

Anyway, the winner is Dr Lucy Pike. She’s the one who suggested the cleanse I did the other week, and she happens to be the only new follower I got out of this whole process, so I’m glad the prize is going to her. Well done Lucy. 🙂

I had thought there was more interest in my blog, but I guess I was wrong. It’s certainly been a clarifying experience for me though. I had been trying to drive interest and build up a readership, but now it just seems like “Why bother?” At least now I can stop worrying about trying to do a post every week and instead get on with other things.

I’m either doing or crossing off for good everything on my perpetual To Do List. I’m not booking a climbing course so why have it on the list? If I do it I’ll do it. Same goes for learning german. If it hasn’t happened yet it probably won’t (and since my ex is seeing someone new now the only reason I was going to learn german in the first place is gone).

I’m just so tired of the muddle, so I’m throwing everything out! The only two things in my life now are teaching yoga and writing my book. Everything else is out the window. It means there’ll be less blogging from me, but it seems that won’t impact many lives, so that’s probably no great loss.

Hopefully greater simplicity will bring me greater happiness. Hopefully looking inward for joy will be more profitable than looking towards the outside world. It’s been a difficult few weeks for me but I’m trying to make the best of it.

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8 thoughts on ““Life Is Pain, Highness.”

  1. Ok, wow. This makes my heart sad that you are so disappointed. As a new blogger myself, I totally get the fuss over the numbers. I can pour my soul into a piece that maybe 25 people will read. No comments. 2 likes. But you know why I keep writing despite that? Because I don’t write it for an audience. I write for me. I have to put words on a page. It helps all the junk in my head get organized. It helps me measure my progress. It gives me an outlet to play with words. It helps me shift a crappy thing into a more positive thing. Writing is a gift, and if you stop, you could be the one who misses out. Either way, I’ve enjoyed your posts – even this one (which was hard to read because of all the negative energy) – because you’re being real. And I will miss reading should you really hang it all up. But in the words of my favorite yogi, you gotta find what feels good. For you. Namaste friend!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for the thoughts.

      I write for me, but what I write for me isn’t this blog but a novel I have been working on. So I’m going to concentrate on that for a while. I’ll probably still blog now and then, but it’ll be when it’s convenient for me, rather than making time to make sure I do it once a week.

      I blog stuff because, like most people, I want to share with others and I want them to show an interest in what I’m doing. The competition kind of shattered the illusion that that was what’s happening. So i just need to put it aside for a while and do something else instead.

      Like

  2. Hey
    I don’t know if there is something in the air or water at the moment (as the saying goes) but I have felt like I have no time for anything recently. I’m on a climbing holiday soon but I feel any posts that will come of it will be repetitive. My blog has falling by the wayside and I’ve been ignoring any WordPress emails. Gone are the days when I blogged EVERY day. I find it hard to balance between a good read, informative piece and it becoming a diary. Every time I tried to drum up interest I didn’t really get any so, as I usually do, I lost a little interest and other things started to take over.
    I like your idea of greater simplicity leading to greater happiness. I hope you find your inward joy. Maybe you can share that journey once a month.

    Namaste

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Threefeet 😉

      I think I will still blog now and then, but as you say, with so much else to do, I have to do what gives most back to me. And right now that seems to be writing and yoga.

      With luck I will do an assisting class at the yoga centre today, the first step on the road to teaching. I’m going to go out and have some human interactions for a while. I think that will be good for me.

      Just FYI, I have been enjoying your blog. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry to read this. I would have entered but I don’t have FB presence so I disqualified myself. FWIW I’ve been enjoying your writing since I found your blog. I guess it depends why you blog though? If it’s about active followers I suspect most of us would be disappointed. But isn’t one quality interaction worth it? I think of blogging as like writing a good old fashioned letter. If only one person gets it, it’s still worth my care and attention. Plus I love writing…
    Good luck with the other projects, and I do hope you hang around a while longer on WP!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks BC. I enjoy your blog too.

      There are many ways to share, to be found at the bottom of each post, including the e-mail link. I don’t FB or tweet or anything like that. Probably another reason I have so few followers. I just figured that with 94 ‘followers’ I’d have gotten more of a reaction than I did.

      I will be doing more posts, but only when it suits me. Think my time will be better spent doing something more rewarding for now.

      Like

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